On anxiety -
It’s something that takes up your capacity to enjoy life. Sure, you can function on auto pilot, but it’s always there just under the surface just waiting to be provoked. It starts right where your ribs meet - like where kids used to draw their hearts before science was introduced to them. This heart is a heavy, knotted pit, but very much alive and pulsating. It radiates constantly. As soon you forget it’s there, you remember. And it’s back. It won’t go away. It doesn’t get better with time. If anything, you try to numb yourself. There are some people that can make you forget, bring you comfort, hold you when you need it. But what about when you’re back in your own bed, alone, scared and half-convinced death brings more solace? Being human hurts.